Why Couples Therapy Is Worth It—Even If Insurance Won’t Pay

If you’re in a relationship that feels strained, distant, or filled with unresolved tension, it’s not just your connection that suffers—your health does too. The stress of a struggling relationship doesn’t stay neatly in one area of your life. It seeps into your mental well-being, your physical health, your work performance, and even how you show up for your kids, friends, and yourself.

So yes, we get it. Therapy is an investment. But if insurance won’t cover it, the real question isn’t “Can I afford couples therapy?”—it’s “Can I afford not to?”

Chronic Relationship Stress = Chronic Health Problems

When you’re stuck in constant arguments, feeling unseen, or disconnected from your partner, your body reacts. Studies have shown that toxic relationship stress can lead to:

• Weakened immune function (meaning more colds, headaches, and fatigue)

• Higher risk of heart disease and high blood pressure

• Increased anxiety, depression, and even sleep disorders

• Worsened gut health and digestive issues (yes, your relationship can literally make you sick)

A study from the American Psychological Association found that people in high-conflict marriages are more likely to experience long-term mental health issues than those who get divorced. 

Your nervous system doesn’t know the difference between a “relationship fight” and a “life-threatening event.” The cortisol spikes (stress hormone) that happen during ongoing conflict can keep your body in a heightened state of tension, which wreaks havoc over time.

Unresolved Issues Don’t Magically Disappear—They Get Worse

Many couples try to “push through” their problems, thinking time alone will heal things. But in reality, unaddressed relationship struggles don’t fade—they fester.

• Communication breakdowns become resentment and stonewalling

• Trust issues turn into emotional distance and avoidance

• Mismatched needs in intimacy become entirely separate lives under the same roof

And eventually, if these issues aren’t addressed, separation (whether physical, emotional, or legal) often becomes the default path.

The Cost Of NOT Doing Therapy Is Higher

Let’s talk numbers for a second. Couples therapy is an expense, but so is:

• Divorce (attorneys, court fees, splitting assets, possible alimony)

• Individual therapy to process heartbreak, betrayal, or unresolved grief

• Lost productivity and job focus due to emotional distress

• The cost of trying again in a new relationship with the same unresolved patterns

In contrast, therapy is an investment in something that actually has a return: a healthier, more fulfilling relationship.

What Happens In Couples Therapy?

If you’ve never been to couples therapy before, you might wonder: What will we actually do?

A good therapist won’t just sit there and ask, “How does that make you feel?” (don’t worry). Here’s what you can expect:

• Communication techniques – Learning how to talk so your partner truly hears you

• Conflict resolution skills – Turning fights into productive conversations

• Understanding triggers – Breaking cycles of resentment and frustration

• Rebuilding trust – Whether from past hurt, infidelity, or emotional disconnection

• Deepening intimacy – Emotional and physical closeness go hand in hand

A trained therapist can help you break toxic patterns, repair wounds, and rediscover the strengths in your relationship.

Your Relationship Affects Everyone Around You

If you have kids, they are watching. They absorb the tension, even if you don’t think they notice. If you’re not in a good place emotionally, that energy spills into your parenting, friendships, and even how you treat yourself.

Choosing to work on your relationship isn’t just about you and your partner, it’s about the environment you’re creating for yourself and the people you care about.

So, Is It Worth It? Absolutely.

Insurance may not cover it, but if your relationship is struggling, couples therapy is one of the most important investments you can make in your well-being.

And if your partner won’t go, start with individual therapy. One person’s growth can shift the entire dynamic. What you do to repair and ease the tension in your relationship will help you physically, emotionally, and spiritually. 

If you’re feeling disconnected, misunderstood, or stuck in negative cycles, let’s talk. You don’t have to figure this out alone—I am here to help.

Ready to begin? Contact my practice today to explore which approach is best for you.